This is a hypothetical monologue that those of us recovering from the effects of addiction might have:

Who is this “me?” “Me” is who takes care of “them.” “Me” is who will be so much better, once “they” are better. Who has time for “me” when there is so much that “they” need to have done? “They” don’t appreciate “me”; “they” don’t see all the good “I” am doing for “them.” “I” know what “they” need, if only “they” would listen. “They” think “they” can take care of themselves, but where would “they” be without “me?” “They” keep making the same mistakes and “I” have to clean up the mess. “I” don’t make mistakes; “I” am too busy with “their” mistakes. “They” will listen; “I” will make them. “I” don’t give up; “I” will find a way to make “them” better. The pain will go away, then “I” will not be so scared all of the time. “They” will see how much “I” love “them,” how much “I” have sacrificed for “them.” Then “they” will make “me” happy, and we will all be better.

Thought for Today: We may think it is easier to be a victim of other people’s behavior than to take responsibility for our own lives. Nar-Anon puts the focus on us and takes it away from the addict(s) in our lives. It is scary to look inside ourselves and take responsibility for what we think and feel. Nar-Anon gives us a safe environment to take those looks, and a loving program to help us grow.

“Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.” ~ Leo Tolstoy