I am a recovering doormat, and a grateful member of Nar-Anon. I was married to an addict for a number of years and went through more suffering than was necessary because I brought it on myself. I blamed him for all my troubles and refused to take on my own responsibilities just as he refused to take on his. That is why I am here.

At first, I did not want to come to Nar-Anon. When I started attending meetings, I did not even listen. I just sat there and vegetated, but somehow I felt better afterwards, so I kept coming back. I started to read the literature. Finally, I shared and that is when I started to get better. That is when I realized that I was where I needed to be and that others understood what I was feeling. Eventually, I was even able to listen to other people’s stories and I started to care about them.

In Nar-Anon, I learned that I am only human. It is comforting to me to realize that the reason I had so many failures in my life is not that I was such a loser, but that I was trying to do things that were physically, mentally and emotionally impossible for mere mortals. When I confine myself to the things I can do and have the right to do, I do just fine. Even if I don’t do just fine, I know that it is because I am only human, and therefore not perfect – just like everyone else.

Thought for Today: The greatest gift I have ever received from Nar-Anon is self-respect. I now know that I deserve love, peaceful surroundings, and respect from myself.

“Having committed our lives to change through these Twelve Steps, we recognize that change is a process and that we will use each of these steps again and again. Like the slogan, “Progress not Perfection,” we are able to gain a deeper understanding of each step each time we focus on our progress.” ~ The Nar-Anon Twelve Step Program

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