I had been in Nar-Anon for several years but I was still having a difficult time. I was still feeling hopeless and frustrated. I did not believe the program was working. I felt that my recovery was not happening fast enough and that my Higher Power was not helping me. I continued to make bad decisions, had a bad attitude, and lectured and argued with the addict in my life. The same character defects I listed in my fourth step inventory a year earlier were still plaguing me. I knew my character defects and had admitted them to anyone who would listen. Why wasn’t God removing them?
A fellow member suggested that I needed to go back and study Step Six. He asked me if I was entirely ready for my Higher Power’s help. He believed that his Higher Power removes only what he is entirely ready to let go. He suggested it might be possible that I still valued my old behaviors and was not ready to let them go.
With that suggestion, I was able to truly work the Sixth Step by examining the reasons that I was holding onto the defects.
By trusting in my Higher Power, I found the courage to be entirely ready to move forward.
Thought for Today: I must be willing and open to change. If I am still focused on the past and the addict and am trying to control others, I am not open to allowing my Higher Power to remove my defects of character.
“Our dilemma is that we hate change and love it at the same time; what we really want is for things to remain the same but get better.” ~ Sydney J. Harris