I divorced my husband of eight years after he broke my arm in a drunken rage. He received jail time for domestic violence and I was sentenced to a Twelve Step program. I was not ready. I thought that everyone at the meeting was completely dippy. How on earth could I condone anyone’s using? Were these people mad or what? I must say, looking back, I had a serious case of selective hearing. I lived in denial and I was incapable of taking an honest look at myself.
Sometime later, I started having problems with my teenage daughter. She crashed my car, cleaned out my bank account twice and pawned most of my appliances. I threw her out. That is when she broke down and confessed that she was an addict. I immediately jumped into action. I was going to fix my child, so super-mom found a treatment center. I started moving mountains to get the money I needed. I begged and even convinced the bank to increase my mortgage. Never mind that I could not afford it and I had no idea how I was going to pay it back. It was my duty to fix my child’s problems.
My daughter completed her treatment, came out and was doing well. The treatment center recommended that I go to Nar-Anon meetings. I ignored that advice. Of course, I did not have a problem. I was, after all, this loving and devoted mom. Six months later, my fall came when my daughter relapsed.
My world fell apart. In desperation, I finally sought help in Nar- Anon. I cannot stress this enough – it was my salvation! Not long afterwards, I discovered that my youngest daughter was also an addict. With the program’s support, and what I have learned, I handled the situation in a much more positive way.
Thought for Today: I have a better perspective now so that I can detach, let go and accept that nothing I do will ever change the choices the addicts make.“We do recover. Slowly, new persons emerge. Change is taking place.” ~ Nar-Anon Blue Booklet