Yes, it hurts; I have tried to deal with my addict boyfriend and the insanity that comes along with addiction. Yet, ever since I went to my first Nar-Anon meeting, I have found hope. Maybe not the hope I expected, but hope nonetheless.
From the program and my fellow members, I am learning a different way to cope with my situation. I see how it has helped the people around me at meetings and I know it is going to be worth it. I think the most profound understanding that I have reached so far is that letting go does not mean leaving him. It does not mean that I cannot think about the person, love him, and pray for him. It means that I must let him do what he has to do right now, and not worry about him because God will help him take care of himself.
It makes me undeniably jubilant to know that I will not be making impulsive road trips at all hours of the night in the vain hope of running across him, just because I cannot think of anything else to do.
I still get crazy and I still cry. I still have a long way to go, but I am more at peace with myself and able to be more supportive of him in my own way. It is a great feeling.
Thought for Today: Just for today, I will smile and be unafraid!
“Practice easing your way along. Don’t get het up or in a dither. Do your best; take it as it comes. You can handle anything if you think you can. Just keep your cool and your sense of humor.” ~ Smiley Blanton MD