The reality that my loved one is an addict and has a disease is a tough reality to face. It is hard for me to have much hope, when the addict is always causing problems for others, as well as himself. The addict’s refusal to seek help, stop lying, and be responsible is very frustrating!

I can see the answers easily, so I ask myself, “Why can’t the addict?” “Does the addict walk around with rose-colored glasses convincing himself that everything is fine?” When disaster strikes, my addicted loved one acts bewildered and unable to understand what has happened. Then, I want to shake him and say, “Face reality. It is as plain as the nose on your face! You are hooked on drugs and that is the problem.”

Of course, trying to get the addict to face reality is not easy. He is in denial about anything being wrong, and definitely does not see the situation the same as I see it. Many times the addict does not even think he has a drug problem. Rose-colored glasses seem to be forever glued to his face. However, there are times when I am also in denial. I allow myself to wear those same rose-colored glasses and convince myself that I can fix him. At times, reality is a tough thing to face and the struggle for growth can be overwhelming. As someone who loves an addict, I must face the reality that I have no control over his disease of addiction or the problems it causes. I must leave the addict alone to discover this on his own. I cannot do it for him.

Thought for Today: I must have the strength to allow the addict to make progress in his own time. Living in denial only hinders the recovery process for me and for the addict.

“The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself.” ~ George Bernard Shaw