Recently I was having lunch on the veranda of a condo with a wonderful view of a beautiful beach. I was peacefully watching the pelican fish, and a pair of seals playing down by the ferry dock. As I was enjoying the serenity of the moment, a boat came down the channel, perhaps a bit faster than it should have. I watched the ripples of its wake disturb first the marker buoys in the channel, and then the boats at anchor nearby. The ripples continued toward the shore, raising then dropping, all in their path. I noticed that the closer an object was to the path of the boat, the more profound the disturbance. The buoys bobbed wildly since they were closest, but by the time the ripples arrived at the shore, the sea gulls barely noticed. It occurred to me that my proximity to the addict has a similar effect on the impact I feel on my life from her using. I realize that I can control that impact by managing the distance at which I keep her problems.
Detaching is not always easy, but it seems that when I view the addict’s problems at a distance, I feel able to objectively assess my own situation. Once I keep myself out of the problem, I can more easily see a solution, even if that only means minding my own business.
Thought for Today: Today I know that detachment is essential to any healthy relationship. Each of us is a free individual, with neither one in control of the other.
“The higher one climbs on the spiritual ladder, the more they will grant others their own freedom, and give less interference to another’s state of consciousness.” ~ Paul Twitchell